Detroit Lions: Opening night loss reminder of bad old days

In an embarrassing 48-17 loss, the Detroit Lions confirmed many of their fans’ preseason fears. What went wrong in Matt Patricia’s head coaching debut?

The Detroit Lions, Matt Patricia show opened in front of a packed house at Ford Field last night. The reviews are in, and it is bad. I can’t even try to describe it in a more detailed or clever way. It looked bad. 

Bad as in, I hope the new Lions’ head coach doesn’t have an active Twitter account. As in, it’s a good thing Ford Field doesn’t sell rotting vegetables at concessions. Bad enough that it’s worth asking the question, “this is what we fired Jim Caldwell for?”

There were whispers coming out of camp that the Patricia era was struggling out of the gates. A shaky preseason (even by preseason standards) was easy enough to explain away. These things take time, of course; just wait until the games count for real.

The games count for real now, and with it, that grace period is over. Unfortunately, this Lions team appears to be exactly as good as advertised.

The Jets finished last place in the AFC East in 2017. They were 28th in total offense and 24th in points scored. They were starting a rookie quarterback on the road in his first career game. Yet, the only thing keeping them from hanging 50 on the Lions last night was that they didn’t feel like it in the end.

Laundry List

It’s not an exaggeration to say that the Lions as a team did nothing well.

The same areas that were a problem last year are still a problem this year (no surprise). In addition, numerous areas that have been solid for years are suddenly becoming problems as well (surprise).

• Quarterback Matthew Stafford was about as bad as we’ve ever seen him. Of his four interceptions, many of them were made from woefully incorrect reads of the Jets defense, jamming ill-advised slant routes directly into traffic.
• Somehow, Detroit’s ground game just might be worse than ever. The leading rusher (Theo Riddick) finished with 20 yards on the night. The team’s biggest free agent signing (Blount) had negative three.
• Cleveland Browns running back castoff Isaiah Crowell torched the run defense for 100+ yards and two touchdowns.Fellow runner Bilal Powell added another 60 yards on 12 carries.
• Rookie quarterback Sam Darnold spotted the Lions a free seven points on his very first pass, but was surgical the rest of the way. That’s the best that Patricia’s famously confusing defensive schemes could conjure?
• Special teams: Out of all the red flags for potential problem areas, this has not been one of them at any point. Two missed field goals and atrocious kick coverage is icing on the cake I guess.

This is the worst the Lions have looked in a season opener since Marty Mohrninweg was coach.

The only (yes, only) bright spot on the night:

• Kenny Golladay looked like a star, with seven catches and over 100 yards. The second-year receiver also made the Lions’ best defensive play of the night, stealing the ball back following a Stafford interception.

The bad news is that Detroit clearly looked the part of a 2-14 team last night. On the plus side, it all only comes out as 0-1 for the time being. It’s only one game; then again, who is going to sit here and say that it doesn’t look really, really bad at the moment?