A Newcomer’s Guide to Things to Discuss After a Detroit Lions Loss


Since it has been so long since the Detroit Lions have lost a football game, many of the bandwagon fans (and media) outside of Detroit don’t know the typical conversations that Lions fans discuss amongst themselves after a Lions loss. Because I love the attention and support the Lions are getting nationwide, I decided to keep these newly initiated members of the Lions fraternity fully informed as to past topics that were always discussed in the blogs and on the airwaves after a Lions loss. This way, if the topics arise again they can appear savvy as to Lions history and hide the fact that they jumped on the Lions bandwagon last spring, not in 1986 like the rest of us.

(For your information, and to appear really knowledgeable, you should know that 1986 was the year Chuck Long was drafted, one of the many quarterbacks taken in the first round by the Lions who failed to lead them to the playoffs.)

Should the backup quarterback start the next game?
By far the most popular topic in the past among Lions fans (and one of the more popular topics in all of Detroit sports, along with “is Brandon Inge a good 3rd basemen?” and “can the Red Wings goalie carry them to the Stanley cup finals?”), this topic is a tried and true conversation starter. With such notable names as Chuck Long, Scott Mitchell, Dante Culpepper, and Jon Kitna as previous Lions quarterbacks, it was always a valid topic. Now, with Stafford showing Lions fans what a  first round draft pick should play like, this topic is hopefully considered dead for the next 10-15 years.

To really appear as a true fanatic of Detroit sports, you can also bring up “why can’t the Red Wings trade for a physical defensemen?” or “remember when Michigan was a good football team?”

Why can’t the Lions seem to adjust at half-time?
Fans new to the Lions might have noticed that the Lions have been behind at the half in their last four games, but have made halftime adjustments and come back to win three of those games. They just assume that this has always been so. However, you should know that it hasn’t always been the case, because in past years it was the other teams that seem to wake up at halftime, come out of the tunnel for the 2nd half and proceed to kick our can up and down the field. So if you take part in this conversation be sure to mention the Patriots game of 2010 (the Patriots outscored the Lions 35-7 in the 2nd half) and people might not notice that your Lions jersey was bought six weeks ago.

Why can’t the Lions ever seem to come out and take a lead in the first half?
A valid point in both this season and seasons past, especially given the point differentials between the Lions and their opponents in the first halves this season. But previous Lions teams tended to start out slow, and then finish slow. Trust me, this is a better alternative.  Reference any game betweeen 2001 and 2008 and you will fit right in.

Is this start good enough to insure that the Lions make the playoffs?
You don’t need to get into too much detail here, just mention the 1980 or 2007 Detroit Lions and everyone will know what you are talking about, and assume that you were right there with them in watching the Lions crash and burn.

Did the Lions head coach get a little too cocky after so many Lions wins, causing him to react irratinally after his first loss in 9 games?
Umm, never had to discuss this topic before – it is strange new territory for the real Lions fan. Feel free to discuss openly, it is a new subject for everyone.