Has it Really Come to ESPN Rating NFL Helmets?

Okay, this is getting ridiculous. I know there’s nothing to write about, now that the draft is over and the lockout seems like it’ll last until the players start missing paychecks in September. Without player movement until then, we in the NFL nation are left with contemplating serious matters like the poll ESPN did on rating the helmets. Really! It’s only the middle of May and already the four letter network is trotting THAT out? What’s next, rating the socks on players? I half expect ESPN to come out with a story about which shoelaces tie the best. I can just see John Clayton going on about the virtues of nylon shoelaces over the old fashioned cotton ones.

The insanity is just starting folks. Be prepared for more of the same. If ESPN can drag people like Clayton and Kevin Seifert into that mess, who am I to not comment on their efforts? This is obviously important stuff. Lets get the obvious out of the way. They ranked the Lions 17th in their poll, leading the bottom half. Personally I think it’s too high. I, like a lot of Honolulu blue and silver faithful, never cared much for “Bubbles”. The name says it ALL. Who around the league is going to fear something called Bubbles? If games were won on helmet logos alone, our only chance is for them to laugh themselves to death looking at our fierce emblem. It did help a little when they muscled him up a few years ago, but it’s still doesn’t represent the King of the Jungle in the proper way. I wear the old logo on my Lions cap, the one from the early sixties that has a silver Lion in front of two stripes that are blue and silver.

The Pittsburgh Steelers were ranked number one. Didn’t the voters notice that one side of their helmet is blank? The Colts came in second place. I don’t know about you, but a horseshoe doesn’t engender much fear in me. Interestingly, the Lions finished the highest of the helmets relating to the cat family. The Panthers landed in the 22nd spot and the Jaguars finished at 26. Cincinnati didn’t receive a single vote. No surprise there since they looked like they were designed by someone with a drug problem. The only one that’s confusing to me is the Cleveland Browns coming in at the 8th spot. That helmet looks like it belongs in the Mardi Gras parade. I’d feel better if they were called the Cleveland Oranges. Personally I think the Raiders, ranked third, have the best helmets. Stay tuned next week when ESPN ranks the top things that players like to eat on game day.

Rating the NFL helmets is obviously important so forgive me for straying into some real football topics. I’m very encouraged by the turnout for the off season workouts that the Lions are currently conducting at Detroit Country Day. “I saw stuff on ESPN and the NFL Network, other teams working out, and I didn’t see this many guys.” said Nate Burleson in a Detroit News article. The Lions having one of the best turnouts during the lockout is a good sign that they believe they can be special next year.

It sounds like Matt Stafford is starting to show some leadership by running the last half an hour of the practice. The previously mentioned Detroit News articles quotes Stafford as follows: “I wanted to get us in personnel groups, formations and show some motion — just to get the guys thinking about football again; make them think about where they’ve got to be, where to line up and what their job is.”

I love the fact that, still not even a rookie yet, Titus Young made it his business to work out with Stafford in Georgia before following him up north for the workouts. If only briefly, it was nice to report real football and not about a helmet beauty contest.

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