The “Curse of William Clay Ford”

This past weekend at Mlive, Killer Kowlaski regaled us with the “Curse of Bobby Layne” story.

"According to football legend, Layne — the Lions’ Hall of Fame quarterback – was angry about being traded to the Pittsburgh Steelers in 1958 and put a curse on the Lions. Although no documentation was found to support it, Layne supposedly said the Lions “would not win for 50 years.”"

Sure, it’s possible Layne did utter such preposterous bullshit, as he was drunk off his ass most of the time. But the odds are good that he was too busy dodging pink elephants, going through the DT’s and praying to the porcelain God to curse the Lions. I seriously doubt Layne had the capability to curse anything other than a bartender for cutting him off.

So for anyone to think only a Bobby Layne issued curse is what ails the Lions? They must be drunk off their asses as well. There has to be more to it…

If there is such a thing as a curse, the last 50 years of suck was not fully brought on by a drunk, pissed off Layne cursing the Lions while on a bender after his trade to the Steelers. Let’s give credit where credit is due, and blame…William Clay Ford.

The “Curse of William Clay Ford” is not an imaginary thing, it’s the God’s honest truth.

Ford is the only constant over the past 44 years of Lions ineptitude. Ford let Russ Thomas run the Lions into the ground with an iron fist, no talent and a closed wallet. Ford has allowed Matt Millen to run the Lions further into the ground with an open wallet, a porn ‘stache, and no fucking clue.

The Lions have a bad draft? You can thank the “Curse of William Clay Ford.” Another losing season? Blame the “Curse of William Clay Ford.” Millen overpays an overrated free agent? You can thank the “Curse of William Clay Ford.” William Clay Ford refuses to fire anyone, for any reason, at any time? Say it with me…It’s the “Curse of William Clay Ford.”

How could you hate such a harmless looking old coot?

It’s quite easy, actually…

I know it’s been said over and over, by fans, bloggers and MSM alike, that nothing will change with the Lions till William Clay Ford sells the team. We know that’s never going to happen…Ever.

To which all I can say is, “Curses!”

OK, let’s take this one step further. As I’ve bought into the idea of a Ford curse, let’s say the Bobby Layne curse has merit. After 50 years, supposedly his curse is now over, so all is well, right? Wrong!

The Killer overlooks the idea that there could be many other Lions curses at work…

Sucky QB’s: “The Curse of Scott Mitchell.”

Overrated linemen: “The Curse of Damion Woody.”

Stone handed wide receivers: “The Curse of Bill Schroeder.”

Injuries: “The Curse of Billy Sims.”

Bad coaches: Take your pick. I’ll say “The Curse of Darryl Rogers.”

Shortsighted roster decisions: “The Curse of Jeff Hartings.”

Let’s not forget we’re 44 years into the aforementioned “Curse of William Clay Ford.”

See? When it comes to the Lions, there could be a curse for damn near everything! If we take the 50 year Bobby Layne curse as a guideline, by my calculations, I just came up with possibly 306 more years worth of curses.

So, if you believe in curses? We fans are screwed. If you don’t? We’re screwed anyway. Such is the life of a cursed Lions fan. And that’s the worst curse of all…