ESPN's prediction for Vikings in 2024 is comedy gold for Lions fans

This is the good stuff.
Minnesota Vikings v Detroit Lions
Minnesota Vikings v Detroit Lions / Mike Mulholland/GettyImages

Even with the Lions once again looking like one of the NFC's heavyweights, things in the NFC North don't look great longterm. The Bears have been one of the more active teams in the NFL this offseason, and even if they're not quite as playoff-ready as the entire city of Chicago insists, they're coming.

The Packers are, of course, the Packers. They're young, they're talented, they're annoying. If any team is equipped to sneak in and take the NFC North title, it's probably them.

That's why the Vikings are so important this year. Their impending 6-win season is the only thing capable of giving Lions' fans hope that not every single NFC North game is going to be a disgusting 10-7 rock fight. Only the Vikings are capable of delivering a nice, boring 12PM kickoff that's over midway through the 3rd quarter. It's not much, but it's honest work.

Fortunately, our friends over at ESPN are here to make sure that happens. They fired up the ol' FPI machine on Monday to give us a kinda weird listicle called, 'Projected 2025 NFL draft order: Patriots at No. 1 overall?' There are no words in this article, only a bunch of percentage points – that's how you know it's good content.

And because you're almost certainly not going to scroll through 30 different data points (we don't blame you) we'll just get right to the most important point: the Vikings are bad. There's even proof!

ESPN projects Vikings as 7th worst team in football

Minnesota Vikings
Average draft position: 10.7
FPI chance to earn No. 1 pick: 4.7%
FPI chance to earn top-five pick: 28%
FPI chance to earn top-10 pick: 54.8%

That's the good stuff. While the Bears and Packers can't be found anywhere higher than 17th, there the Vikings are, in all their glory, down at 7. This is the comedy gold that the headline was referring to. This is the stuff that gets us out of the bed in the morning, ready to blog.

Thank you FPI. You're our guiding light, our north star. We'd be nothing with you and your sick sense of Vikings humor.